General Update

I've decided that since LJ is mostly dead I'll just link to my FA posts from now on.

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6164654/




Back to the grind...

As of last week I've gone back to working. I was enjoying my time relaxing and learning new job skills, but had a decent opportunity or two that were worth pursuing.

I had a friend move recently to the area. Just did my annual STD tests ( negative as usual ) at the usual place ( Harborview ). Not much else been going on.

Questions, comments, feel free to -wuff- at me.

Wolf J Lupus




The True American Vacation: Unemployment

What's the true American vacation ( European Style )? Being unemployed.

As of Monday I've been enjoying being relatively stress free. Ordinarily that wouldn't be the case but I'm happy to no longer be working for my former job. It's long been due to get out of there with the continuing decline of quality and it's increase in internal issues. Over the last year and a half it slowly became a lot of the things I do not like in larger companies with no real end in sight ( all while still paying small company wages ). As usual I was honest about the issues I see and such, but in typical big company fashion they did nothing and didn't even bother to really address these concerns at all. Which is not how this place used to be, it used to be much more functional.

That's ok though, it's time for me to be more serious with my career and find somewhere that I can actually advance. It's probably time go back to larger companies and find a good department where I can thrive or otherwise a smaller company with true vision and the means to not just grow but have everyone grow with the company. So I'm going to take it slow, maybe get a Red Hat cert and/or work contract jobs while I look for other possible long terms jobs ( or just do contract work and possibly make more with a lot more time off inbetween ).

For ya local/semi-locals I'm free to hang out a lot more often for now but the catch 22 is that obviously I don't have much fundage to do much. =P




Another update.

So probably time for an update since it's been several months since the last one.

Con/Vacation

I just got back from a trip to St Louis MO for a con ( GFM ) and to visit a few friends. The con was ok, it was it's first so it needs some work but it was fine considering. The usual highlight was really spending time with the friends I came with and did some fursuiting.

House/Dogs

RV tenant vacated awhile ago. We have two extra people here temporarily/possibly permanently depending on how things go ( we technically have 7 people in the house/mini-cabin and 5 dogs between us =P ). Three of the therians living here will eventually buy a 5th wheel to live in the RV slot. So we're very full up right now, though at the least the 3+1 are fairly good about not being an issue so it's not really that bad.

Puppy is being a pain here and there with the arrival of one new dogs here with one of the new people but so far not unmanageable. That dog is passive at least which is probably the only reason it's not a bigger problem.

Work/Scripting

Work is still fairly busy and annoying at times. We'll see what happens at my review that is still pending.

I've been trying to branch into more development roles on my own time. Right now I'm learning Drupal framework to get more scripting going and decided I might as well use a common framework to help out and not reinvent the wheel all the time. Plus doing so will help push me more into both object oriented programming, databasing and keeping to a specific structure ( basically filling in some of the gaps of knowledge and experience I should have in these areas ). The trade off being it will be a lot easier to pump stuff out. Then I might be able to also take side jobs in web development and maint.

Friend's Dog Passing/Therian/Zoo/Spiritual Stuff

I just confirmed a few days ago, what I suspected, that my friends dog passed ( Wanderer ) shortly after that dog's mother passed on ( she was blind the last few years of her life and he was assisting her in those respects ). Around the same time frame ( I have no way to confirm dates ) I had an overwhelmingly unusual feeling that something happened to someone close to me ( such as family ). I eventually figured that it might have been related to him a few days later after no one close to me ended up having any issues I just never confirmed until now.

This isn't the first time I've known a dog I've been well connected to has passed and confirmed it afterwards, but it never did that to me before. But then this dog was probably the first I ever really felt I could have a relationship with and is also why I shut down and built walls relating to connecting more deeply with animals ( because it's very hard to form such bonds and never get to explore them ). He's one of the few that I've met I could communicate well with on very deep levels. A simple touch was able to convey a lot.

I'm still coming to terms with his passing. I knew years ago we could never be together, so I had pretty much come to terms with that long ago. If anything I'm feeling the draw to return "home" and not in any literal sense. It doesn't help the majority of what I'm dealing with in this respect also was forced to be dealt with while also being shifty ( since being shifty triggers other stuff much like internal issues also trigger shifty type stuff ). So both combined just make me really feel like not continuing being human which is not something I'm not used to feeling here and there ( so don't worry ).

Part of how I can tell someone close to me died is that I feel their spiritual energy released, freed and then become a part of me and everything else. The living form to me is just a temporary vessel. As far as I can tell Wanderer is in process of transitioning ( I believe in reincarnation ) so to a lessened degree we've been in contact spiritually. Both he and his mother have been trying to steer me "back on track".

So yeah, I'm sure a lot of this is rather confusing. I don't expect most of you to really "get this". So no worries.

Other Stuff

Not much else has changed on personal and relationship fronts ( though I meet new people here and there ). I need to keep trying to connect with people and let them get to know me, even if they're not really located near me. I really shouldn't disconnect myself as much as I have been as there are some prospects out there just simply aren't that local. Also, I should get my website back up and putting more personal content out there since a lot of who I am isn't really knowable unless those resources are out there. It's hard to see depth in people if you're only seeing a lot of the surface.

But yeah, I guess that's about it. Any questions feel free to ask.

Take care,

*nuzz*




Long Overdue Update

So yeah finally an update...

Dogs/Donkeys

Cody had surgery on one of his hind quarters to remove cancer, he's doing well. The apparent super fleas from KY after months work were 95% taken care of and then a few weeks ago we did another treatment, no fleas so far. They should all be dead now. I've never had such a problem getting rid of fleas, so those KY fleas are seeming much more evolved that the ones we see here in WA from time to time.

The donkeys we found another home in Eastern WA where it's not as moist. The jack was having even worse issues with his hoves that keeping them he'd likely have to be put down due to the ever increaing hoof problems. Apparently this is more of a common issue ( soft hooves ) with light colored hooved animals. So for now no barnyard creatures.

Roomies/Tenants

The three therian house tenants have been doing well. The RV tenant may be vacating here soon.

Work

Work has been crazy and really irritating here at times. I've had to switch to just sitting back and watching things unfold without my expertise/oppinion unless specifically asked ( which is not normal ) as well as no longer coding tools that save time and money ( as they're not appreciated and I keep getting flack by those who just don't get what I'm trying to accomplish / meanwhile no one else gets the same flack ).

It's a smaller company that's becoming more like a big company and not always in the good ways all while paying small company wages. I can litterly make more than twice as much elsewhere, but to me money isn't everything compared to working in a company and job I like, but the work environemnt for me isn't nearly as good as it used to be with little prospect on the horizon. I'm at the top position as a Network Engineer and There's basically nowhere internally else to advance to other than management ( which there's no positions ). I'm also the senor person in my group and I rarely feel I'm respected or my opinion is given any weight. I've brought up all my issues with this before ( more than once ) but no real change.

I'm trying to expand my experience more into the cloud server/VM side of things on my own time to either grow with the current company, do side projects or find work elsewhere at a company I like that will more fully appreciate my efficency and what I bring to the company.

I could go on and on but yeah... =P

Personal/Spritual

I'm still mixed with good and bad on the personal fronts. I'm still going long periods without any substancial connections. It would be nice to actually have a relationship and/or close friendship with tha substancial connection with some consistency. I updated my pounced ad to be a little more inviting and may eventually try and add more general content in various places to include maybe some of the previous content of my old website.

But still the general situation of my lack of ability to really connect well enough with most people is proving more and more likely I'm not suited for anyone or otherwise will find a situation that would work for a long term relationship. Which would probably be ok if I had something else to fulfill that side of things in consistency ( which has been proving to be increasingly difficult over the years ).

Spiritually I'm mixed, I'm not really sure where I am right now, though not much has changed there. At the least I get some spiritual connection with the roomies here and there.

Anything Else

Not much else I can think of for now. Any questions or thoughts feel free to poke me.




Long Time No -wuff-

Well I guess it's long overdue for an update.

Con: RF + Fursuit

Dirus and I will be attending RF. We actually both now have partial fursuits ( or I will here once it gets here ). That'll be interesting. Feel free to say hi and such if you're going and if ya wanna hang out.

Roomies/Tenants

We went from no tenants to 3 house ones and a RV tenant about two months ago now... The three house mates are therians "from" KY. It's been going rather smooth actually, less issues with three of them than just one of some of past tenants/roomies. It may wind up being more long term if it keeps up like this.

Got a RV tenant was a semi rescue from CA.

Work

Work has been fairly hectic, but slightly calmer this week. Very busy, still continually learning more and more.

Dogs/Donkeys

Dogs are doing relatively ok, other than some fleas, but fleas rarely take hold here for very long at all.

The mini donkeys are doing better, their white line disease is actually getting better and ironically more so the less were doing treatment ( likely it's just because of the weather changes ).

House

Endless house projects such as two bathroom remodels, back deck, arial dog run, upkeep, etc... At least last weekend we went camping to break the routine of working on the weekends ( which camping was nice ).

Furmeets

Went to several meets last month. It seems all the 3 usual ones we usually go to all happened that month. We don't go to many though maybe with fursuits we might be more inclined?

Also did some snorkeling here and there but not ideal conditions unfortunately.

Eating Better

I've been changing my eating habits a little. Eating better more and more, eating less hormone and pesticidal filled crap, less various chemicals in general. I've mostly given up soda, even more so diet soda ( which seem rather confirmed to be the cause of the occasional migraine ). I actually feel better inside and have more energy at times because of it, which is more the goal, not so much to lose weight.

Not to mention I actually like what I'm eating and because I'm eating things with actual nutrients I don't feel nearly as much the need to eat.

Guns

I bought a new Glock, one a slight more concealable ( sub compact ) and higher caliber ( 10mm ) along with a 40mm conversion barrel. I'm more accurate with it than my full sized 9mm that I used to carry most the time ( half concealed ). Dirus will likely buy my 9mm with the .22 conversion slide so I also bought a Rugger .22 for plunking.

Personal

Been mixed internally. Work, house and various other activities spread me thin sometimes. even having the new roomies does a bit but in reality that usually a better thing than not. I just have to make sure to get the sleep I need 90% of my work days. It's nice having 3 therians around and more general stimulus in ways I'm not used to with most people. Still though there's much needed to be dealt with internally and also that doesn't fully resolve issues such as deeper needs.

I go long periods at times still without deep connections and it does effect me. Time compounds the wounds/needs for something with more meaningful and lasting substance. Like an actual relationship of sorts. Finding one of those for me, since I've very much not compatible with most people is rather a fruitless task. If only I easily connected and developed feelings for people, but I don't, so it's not easy to really find even less ideal connections to fill that void and grow. But it is what it is...

Spiritually

I'm still rather guarded on the spiritual front and having therians around tends to introduce more on the spiritual sides. Feeling phantom wings here and there, which actually bothers me ( though it shouldn't, as I should explore that openly ) mainly because it has more of angelic quality and I'm not fond of Christianity because I'm an x-reborn Christian ( I feel the desire to chew my wings off when I feel them - though they're likely not mine just an influence of sorts ). All three therians are Chirstian too, but obviously not of the "usual" variety so it's no surprise there's that influence around.

The internal stuff I've been pushing tot he side and ignoring certainly is eventually going to have to resolve itself. The influences around will ensure that. I've let myself get too fragmented and gone too long without fully recharging/facing my issues inside. So "hard shift" is likely to occur soon. Maybe I should purposely push myself over the edge by watching some Wolf's Rain, IDK...

( If you don't know what I'm talking about, it's mostly therian related )

Anything Else

Umm, hmm, not sure what else. I guess if anyone has questions they can feel to ask.

Take care *nuzz*




Roomie Slot Open ( Snohomish, WA )

The house slot is open again for possible renters. See link below ( post responses there ).

http://wolfjlupus.livejournal.com/68893.html




RV Slot Open ( Snohomish, WA )

RV slot is open again for possible renters. See link below ( post responses there ).

http://wolfjlupus.livejournal.com/68893.html




RIP: Grandma

Rest in peace Grandma,

Your stubbornness kept you alive many years longer than anyone could have expected. It nice to have seen you one last Christmas. I'm glad you are no longer trapped in your body with the comma you were in this past week.

May happiness find you wherever you go. All of us who were touched by you life will miss you. I love you.

*howls*

~__~




More On Wolf + Spiritual Experiences

I didn't really know Wolf THAT well to be honest though I still considered him a friend. I knew of his kindness and generosity that he freely gave to many ( many probably not really deserving of it ). He opened himself and his home for those who were almost strangers. He invited many others to join together in community endeavors. He will be missed by many.

I hope his spark lives on in the lives he's touched and they too can try and be as open and generous to those who are in need and to strengthen the bonds of those around them.

Thanks again Wolf.

((( I don't really expect anyone to believe any of the rest of this, but I really don't care about that, it is my experience none the less. )))

So I spent some time tonight in the hot tub, reflecting further on Wolf, Goldie, Camber and Lady's passing ( as well as other effected by todays events ). Connecting with them spiritually. Wolf and Camber came to me more specifically tonight, Camber more in passing. Tonight is actually when I met the Wolf I never knew. He actually enticed me to play and I eventually gave him chase inside myself ( on two different personal spiritual plains ). It was very liberating ( and I was reacting strongly, usually spiritual stuff is dulled a lot when I'm in hot water ) as generally very little else ever interacts with me there. We also spoke about a few things also, some words of encouragement. He acted like he might stick around for awhile ( like more than just the night ). It will be interesting if he does...

Death to me isn't really the end. I actually find it sort of a "liberation" from your physical "prison" in some respects. It's why when usually people and animals pass, that I'm aware of/connected to, I can usually feel when they've passed. I feel them everywhere and within myself. I don't feel that they have pain, suffering and grief lingering... that's us survivors... Really I tend to react the most to those effected around me at that point. I mean sure I still go through my own grieving but usually it's short lived. I did most of that right when I got home from work. I gave my goodbye howls.

Anyway, I felt compelled to share my experience and in general some thoughts on Wolf. He may no longer be in his human form but in my opinion he's still very much out there.

I wish all involved or who know/knew Wolf, Camber, Lady and Goldie a swift recovery be it physical, emotional and/or spiritual.




Latest Month

October 2014
S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031 

Links

Syndicate

RSS Atom
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Lilia Ahner